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Home > Christian Humor

Christian Humor


It is good to start the day with a chuckle from time to time.
 
GOOD SAMARITAN
             A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story
              of the Good  Samaritan. She asked the class, "If you saw a person
              lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would
              you do?"  A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence,
              "I think I'd throw up."

  DID NOAH FISH?
             A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think
              Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the
Ark ?"  "No," replied
              Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms."


   THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD
             A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class
              memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23
             She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter.  Little Rick
              was excited about the task - but he just couldn't remember the Psalm.  
             After much practice, he could barely get past the first
              line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to
              recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky was
              so nervous.  When it was his turn, he stepped up to the
              microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd,
              and that's all I need to know."

  UNANSWERED PRAYER
              The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her
              father always paused and bowed his head for a moment before
             Starting his sermon.  One day, she asked him why.  "Well,
              Honey," he began, proud that his daughter was so
              observant of his messages.  "I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good
              sermon."  How come He doesn't answer it?" she asked.


  BEING THANKFUL
             A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, "So your
              mother says your prayers for you each night?  That's very
              commendable. What does she say?"    
              The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"


  ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS
              When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she
              would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal
              (current and past).  For several weeks, after we had finished the
              nightly prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls."  This soon
              became part of her nightly routine, to include this
              closing.  My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli,
              why do you always add the part about all girls?"  Her response,
              "Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying 'All Men'!"


  SAY A PRAYER
               Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner
              at his Grandmother's house.  Everyone was seated around the
              table as the food was being served.  When Little Johnny received his
              plate, he started eating right away.  "Johnny!  Please wait
              until we say our prayer." said his mother.  "I
              don't need to," the boy replied.  "Of course, you do"
              his mother insisted.  "We always say a prayer before
              eating at our house."  "That's at our house." Johnny
              explained.  "But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to cook.


  THE BIBLE
             Did you know that...
             When you carry the Bible, Satan has a headache.
             When you open it, he collapses.
             When he sees you reading it, he faints.
             Let's read the Bible every day
             So he keeps on fainting.
             Maybe one day he'll have a stroke and never wake up.
             And did you also know that when you are about to forward
             this email to others, the devil will discourage you
             but forward it anyway.





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